Recently, I was talking to one of my oldest friends in the world. We meet often and talk about a lot of things. However, because we grew up together, our childhood comes up often.
We usually talk about about how we used to ‘fool’ Raghu Sir by showing him someone else’s homework. We talk about Mukhia sir’s lessons on the correct pronunciation of the words ‘penis’ and ‘vagina’. We remember the fights that took place between the Mcgregors and Khabibs of our class and other stupid stuff that we did as kids.
This day, though, we diverted from what we usually talk about and started talking about the punishments that we used to get as kids. Today, I am going to share my top 4 with you guys because top 3 and top 5 are overused and totally not because I couldn’t think of a fifth one.
Let’s start from the bottom, shall we?
4. Fine Money
I have seen some teachers whose idea of a punishment is making the students pay some amount of money as a fine. I can kind of see the logic behind this: The student will have to ask their parents for money and the parents will scold them and teach them a lesson. It’s a win-win for the teachers because they don’t have to deal with the student and they can make some side income. But, they fail to see the bad in this! The student won’t go home and tell their parents. One of the following will take place. The first one is the student will use lunch money to pay the fine, which leaves the poor student hungry. The second is if the student is kind of a bully, then they will take the money from some other kid who will not be able to have lunch that day!
This happened to me once. Me-hatma Gandhi had given my homework to a friend. That dumbass copied my homework but forgot to bring my notebook to class. I was humiliated in front of the class and I had to pay the fine too. The teacher said the collected money would be used for class. I seriously don’t remember what the money was used for. I was a fat kid and I didn’t eat lunch for five days! The horror!
3. Go Stand Outside!
This one used to be more of a blessing than a punishment. Who doesn’t want to go out and breathe the fresh air while your friends listen to boring lectures in class? I think teachers give this punishment because they are too irritated by the particular student(s) and don’t think they have the energy to handle them. I feel you teachers! Some kids can be pretty irritating.
For me though, ‘go stand outside’ was the worst punishment I could get. This was because both my sisters studied in the same school and they were very good students. I didn’t want my sisters to spot me. I also didn’t want their teachers to spot me because they would probably tell my sisters. Yes, I was spotted! multiple times!
2. Getting Tied to the Railing
There was this particular teacher in our school, Rahgu Sir, who used to tie people to the railing of the balcony. He achieved this feat by using the neckties that we used to wear. The person who was tied looked like a goat grazing in a peaceful field, away from the boring lessons in class. Someone finally made use of the useless neckties we needed to wear to school!
There was this one time when Prakash told Raghu Sir that he had done his homework when, in fact, he had not. The teacher got even more creative this time because of the limitations of the ground floor (there was no balcony). He tied him to a chair and asked him to take laps around the class with the chair still tied to him.
Seriously! some teachers’ punishments are so creative that they need to get their asses to the patent office and file a request for a patent.
1. Get Naked!
This is the only punishment in here that sort of touches a dark area (pun intended!). I don’t know if this happened only in my school but there were multiple teachers who would ask the students to get naked as a punishment. I mean, what the hell was wrong with those teachers? I understand if they wanted to see the kid naked. It’s easy to explain that using pedophilia. But why was it a punishment? On top of that, most of the teachers who gave this punishment were females and the punishment was almost always given to males. (#metoo) I guess becoming a teacher is the perfect job for pedophiles. If someone questions them then they can just be like, “Bruh! It’s just a punishment!”
Yes, I have blurred memories of this punishment being given to me. I remember this one time pretty clearly though. There was this girl who was asked to write down names of people who were disturbing the class. The girl looked at me and gave me this evil smirk. You know, the kind that kids give when they are about to irritate you and they know you can’t do anything about it. I have lived 23 years and I have never seen an evil kid smirk that tops that one. I swear I was behaving well that day but it looks like she thought I was being naughty. But, in fact, she was the one who was being naughty! She gave me that smirk and wrote down my name. After the class was done, I waited for my punishment and as you may have guessed; the teacher (a female) asked me to get naked. If it were any other day, I would have stripped right down for her pleasure. I wasn’t a very shy kid. But that day, I wasn’t wearing any underwear. Both of us struggled that day. I struggled to keep my pants on and the teacher struggled to get my pants off. In the end, I won! I walked away with a life lesson that ‘you should always wear underwear’.
Do you guys have any childhood punishments which make no sense to you?